Oh my god, I loved it. It was hilarious and heartwarming at the same time. Not so much in a typical sense, but just that my heart really went out to Sadie what with having such an awful mother. Plus I feel like the friendship between her and Chelsey as well as the one with her younger brother could have potential to be really sweet. Your writing is also very descriptive and helps a lot to picture the scenes well in my head. It reminds me a lot of MTV's Daria, but darker. I disagree with a lot of the comments that are wondering why she has such negative feelings towards her family. Isn't it obvious? I thought you made it very clear that she's the black sheep and oftentimes black sheeps are such for almost no reason at all. That's just the way a lot of families work. Plus it's only the pilot and you have so much potential for future episodes to expand on it.
Overall, I loved it and wouldn't change a thing. I'd definitely watch this show. I think you might like to read my pilot as well. It's similar in the sense that it focuses around realistic portrayals of teenagers and youth in a comedic fashion.
Keep up with the writing!
This one didn't work as well for me as Riley P.A. did. The writing is fine - it's the premise I had a hard time with. The mother is so overdone I just can't buy her - and I have a huge capacity for the willing suspension of disbelief. Also - the mom is not funny and if you are going to go even halfway that far with a character she HAS to be funny. But I like Sadie and her brother, the father works too. The flips in and out of hallucinations work for me (although you could make the transitions out a little less abrupt and it would work better I think) and overall it's an intriguing storyline. I wonder if there is a way you could pull the mom back some and give her a very clear motivation for oppressing Sadie (other than the girl doesn't want to go to church) and still keep it within the world you've created? I think if the mom character worked, and if there was a clear yet funny reason for Sadie to so desperately want out, this has great potential. You have a nice style (I see some similarities to Riley P.A. stylistically) and a true gift for unique storylines. I'd love to see a rewrite :)
I liked parts of it, but it feels like Sadie is a huge complainer. "Oh poor me, my family has money." To man times it just feels like some rich kid is angry becasue her mommy and daddy don't love her. I keep thinking, "what is there to complain about, your white aren't you?"
It feels liek there needs to be more personal tragedy to make her hate her mother and family. Being from a catholic family doesn't seem like enough. If you take away the language it feels like a hot topic/CW show.
For the record I liked Daria, but Daria didn't complain like Sadie, she just didn't give a shit.
Brenna, i like what i've read of this so far. I agree with Gh0stwr1ter that maybe there should be a reason for Sadie to rebel and why she is so interested in occult culture/mysticism and slagging off Catholicism. Also perhaps we could get some context in about Danny - why is he so special and what is it that makes the two siblings contrast eachother, yet be so supportive of eachother. It would also be good to get a sense of how she is different from your typical teenage -emo-goth! Aside from that, i really enjoyed what i've read so far and look forward to reading more.