Thanks so much for taking the time to review 'coming around'. You make some excellent points and your feedback will certainly be taken onboard.
To respond to the issue of the principal protagonist, that's Nathan in the full version. His gang actually don't figure that largely in the second half of the story. It's interesting that you thought that though and I'll take a re-read of it with that in mind.
The full version is actually uploaded onto the site if you did want to finish it, but don't feel any pressure to do so, you've been a huge help already.
Hey!!! Thank you so much for your review, I appreciate you taking the time to go through it and thank you for your comments, I have been snowed under at the moment but I hope to get returning the favours soon :) I have a full draft but the ending is still a bit up in the air. Thanks again!