Reviews written by mattman2900
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Read the first ten pages, here's my take:
Within the first page you have multiple paragraphs of action, but it reads like a novel. While I know you are attempting to set the sc... Read More
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This is an intriguing concept and very suspenseful. Quick read and kept my interest. However, there are few things that you should try and improve upon. First there were some er... Read More
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When writing a screenplay, while you are telling a story, you want to show that story to the reader as if the reader is the audience. The ever-common-but-needed phrase "Show don't ... Read More
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The story itself is okay, a few cliched moments, but if you rework some descriptions and dialogue scenes they may work better.
As a fellow writer, everyone is quick to tell HOW you shoul... Read More
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*Potential Spoilers*
Dan,
Great idea, concept and setting.
This was short and to the point, which is good as it makes for an easy read. However I... Read More
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I'll be honest - I almost stopped reading after the first ten pages. Why? I found nothing that was any different that other teen movies. So what kept me interested? Not sure really, maybe the i... Read More
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Very descriptive, very quick read and was easy to follow. The dialogue formatting could be improved. Quick and concise is for me somewhat acceptable, at least in this type of story, though setting t... Read More
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Very descriptive and nice pace. Just keep an eye out when using 'ing' words and are. They are usually not necessary. When you said Leaking blood, it's not needed. Leaks works just as well. Second ... Read More
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If there's one rule I've learned and believe me, even I still have trouble trying to remember it when I'm focused on getting words written onto the page, but that rule is "If it's not going to be seen... Read More
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A fresh take on how one deals with obstacles in life. Julia manages to capture the essence of the varied emotions and tells a Poignant, view through the eyes of Tasha and how she feels void at t... Read More
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Yeah, it's a little long, it probably will play out around a minute or two. I really didn't find it a surprise, maybe because the whole turn geeky girl into hot girl (basically put a hot girl in po... Read More
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This was a definite moving piece, a little somber but somewhat inspiring... at least from what I could gather. Other than the big giant watermark the large action blocks are distracting to say the ... Read More
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Very good concept... planet behind the moon. I enjoyed the action and the suspense of what was coming next. What I didn't like was how 'young' the characters seemed to talk. They are supposed t... Read More
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The writing is good. The dialogue seemed great but as you move further along it gets heavier like the action descriptions, and wordiness. It's okay to describe a scene but I think the more straig... Read More
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I enjoyed it, and didn't really see the ending as a twist as some people might if they didn't catch all the clues, but maybe because this is my genre I already knew what was going on and what was goin... Read More
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Really a good short read. Pay attention and you'll find that the end is cleverly unexpected. Quite humorous and it's hard to right GOOD comedy that other people find funny. might have given th... Read More
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It was pretty good. This genre and concept though has been done numerous times and I didn't see many differences that the teen films. However I've also written a film like this and can relate to ... Read More
