New Year's Luck
Never before has the words "become a fan" seemed so underrated. I loved, LOVED this script. It was right up my ally and something I'd definitely enjoy if it was on at the cinema. Simply brilliant.
Okay so heres some specific examples of what I liked and didn't (although I couldn't really find anything I didn't)
"shit, shower, shave" - just brought back loads of memories for me and I haven't heard that phrase in ages. A classic.
"laugh o meter" - made me laugh out loud haha, Brilliant again.
Basically what I'm trying to say is your dialogue here is so well written, it's reached the point of me not having to read through it, but rather watch the conversations unfold in my head.
The characters were so well developed. I loved how each of them were different in their own way. Favs had to be....gah I can't choose. But If I did it would be Dave, closely followed by Harry.
Also the use of the shop at the beginning of the feature was a great way of introducing the characters one by one.
There are some fantastic moments in here and here are a few of my favourites.
Gina stealing the woman's coat - it was so absurd it was wonderful.
Nicole throwing drink over Dave's shirt - oh how this made me laugh! I didn't see it coming at all, brilliantly done, it made for some great, truely honest, interaction between the characters.
It felt like an upbeat, happy but dramatic version of Love actually. Stu was an interesting subject too, I liked him as a divorcee and the thought of him maybe finding new love.
Gah too many good things to say about this so I'll end with the one and only comment that was bad or kinda bad.
Like you've noted in the script itself, I'm not sure the Cafe would be open. Now obviously changing the Cafe for anything else would mean rewriting all of their scenes. But it might be worth it, say if you had Stu taken to a strip club or house party, that could prove interesting. But yeah whilst everyone was out and being drunk and merry it seemed odd they were sipping coffee in a cafe.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOD SHIT! Let me know if you ever and I mean EVER write any more. I'd be more than happy to read!
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